What your coffee order says about you

Walking through town, it’s unusual not to see 72 coffee shops and at least 64% of shoppers sporting a takeaway coffee cup. And serving people these caffeinated concoctions daily has given me a pretty good idea on what sort of a student you are, solely based on what you demand from your barista. Check out what your coffee order says about you:

Flat White

Always looking for the indiest band, restaurant or trend, you probably liked flat whites before it was cool. You’re most likely an English student or studying some sort of Arts subject. Known for the picture perfect ‘latte art’, flat whites are the perfect choice if you’re going to upload a pic for the gram. It’s more than likely that you add a plethora of sugar afterwards to mask the taste of the strong coffee, but what’s important is that you have evidence of the new independent café you’ve visited that nobody has heard of, and sat doing your work and contemplating the bigger issues – Valencia or Nashville for the filter….?

Almond milk Latte

You love the planet, hemp clothes and overpriced granola bars. The chances are, you study either Geography or a form of Biology in the aim of improving the doomed world in which we reside. Veganuary is old news, you’ve been vegan for 3 years and love to tell everyone about how amazing you feel on a plant-based diet, encouraging them to join your new veggie society.

Every time a new dairy-free milk is introduced into mainstream coffee chains, you do a little celebration dance, and you welcome any new vegans to the clan with some sort of tofu cake.


Wannabe coffee drinker, you hate the taste but need the hit. I don’t know what subject you study, but you are a master procrastinator who would much rather be in the pub with a pint than the library with a coffee. Mochas are for those of you who only slept three hours before a day of labs, but are repulsed by the concept of espresso.

You want to fit in but aren’t willing to take the leap to proper coffee yet. A proper people pleaser, you always try to make sure the people around you are having fun, and you’re truly adaptable to whatever situation you find yourself in.

Black Americano

For the hardcore coffee fans (or the student who’s left their dissertation until the last 24 hours before the deadline). I’d guess you study maths or physics, and are currently questioning that decision. Imaginary numbers and 1243 different theorems have you questioning what’s actually real these days. If this is your order, you don’t like a fuss or any attention. When it comes to big events or birthdays and the like, you try and remain invisible. You hate drama and just want to get things dealt with swiftly and efficiently.


Clearly not a coffee order. But it seems you’ve been drinking tea since you could hold your own bottle and you vow to change for nobody. You’re a bit of a homebody, as much as you love the student life, you’d much rather be curled up with a cuppa than catching up over cocktails.

Incredibly passionate about not only the ‘right’ way to drink tea (milk no sugar, am I right?), but about supposedly more important topics such as politics and the economy. You’re reliable and loyal, although you might not take many risks, you’re more than happy to continue living your best life while sipping your tea – and maybe spilling the tea too…

Hot Chocolate

Soft, innocent and oh so pure. These students just can’t handle their caffeine. Not quite sure why they ever left the comfort of home for student life. Forever trapped in the memories of your childhood and in complete denial when it comes to accepting adult responsibilities. Nights out are your speciality. The addition of marshmallows and cream only serves to increase your joy (and chances of getting diabetes). Not trying to be anything you’re not, you love yourself, and I take my hat off to you.

One shot sugar-free caramel decaf skinny latte with cream

Firstly, how on earth did you discover this monstrosity? And why would you then continue to drink it? I’d guess you study business or psychology and haven’t looked at your bank account…. Well, ever? This is not a coffee, it is flavoured milk, and it is weird. Anyone who orders anything along these lines is likely glammed up and seemingly always ready for their next selfie.

Always put together and never seen with a hair out of place, you appear to have your life sorted. It’s more than likely you have over 1k followers on Instagram and have just started your own YouTube channel, you #influencer. You’ll probably ask for a straw to drink it with and sashay off, texting while you slurp.

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