What to expect if you’ve never been to a nightclub before

If you’ve never been to a nightclub before, then Freshers’ Week is going to be a wild one for you. University is all about trying new experiences and you might find that you enjoy a night out clubbing! Just maybe try not to write an essay afterwards.

The first thing to expect is noise

It’s like a wall of pure bass and it will take a while for you to get used to it. Also, get used to not knowing what your mate is saying unless you’re shouting in each other’s ears. If you can lip read pretty well that will come in handy.

The second thing is dirt/mess, whatever you want to call it

Staff might have cleaned earlier in the day, but they can hide most issues by turning off the lights. Wherever there are drunk people, disaster tends to follow so expect spilt drinks, broken glass and my personal favourite, vomit.

Sense when you need a wee early

It tends to vary from place to place but if you’re having to queue for twenty minutes and you’ve got to the point where it’s painful, it’s not pleasant.

Watch out for the bouncers

The rare gems will genuinely wish you a good night and make sure you’re okay; the majority, however, are large men with an even larger attitude. Try to be polite and definitely try not to look and seem drunk. They’ll use any excuse not to let you in, and sometimes they won’t even use an excuse because they’re unpleasant as people.

the toilets

A very important thing to be wary of. As mentioned earlier, disaster follows drunk people so don’t get your hopes up for a clean, shiny and sweet-smelling loo. Expect more along the lines of graffitied, no toilet paper and at least one toilet blocked from various excretions.

Stephanie Bennett

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